All right guys, here is the deal. I can clean. Not in that OK I vacuum-my-house-and-make-sure nothing-is-crawling-out-of-the-toilet-clean that some people do every other week. When I clean it's a dump-everything-out-of-the-drawers-wipe-the-baseboards-build-up-a-sweat-and-call-it-gym-time-every-week-clean. What can I say, it's my talent. I used to fill bad that I couldn't sing or dance or draw but, I can look at a closet or drawer and just know how stuff is supposed to fit into that space. I am to drawer organizers what Michelangelo was to stone. Maybe I am being vain, but I think that I am that good. The funny thing is I just thought everyone was like that. I mean my mom is, my Aunt Karen is, my cousin Annie is, my sisters are. . . . .Wait I am noticing a trend here. Maybe this thing is in my DNA. I really think we might have evidence of the existence of a cleaning gene here. I know that not everyone is like this. The other day I was at a friend's house while she was unloading her dishwasher and she opened like three cabinets before she found a place to put her mixing bowls. WHAT? How can every item in your kitchen not have a designated spot? And she didn't even stack the bowls from biggest to smallest. She just threw them in there and quickly shut the door. Deep down in my obsessively clean genes I am pretty sure I heard my dead Grandmother wince. She passed away when I was in Junior High, but from what I hear, she was the original obsessively clean lady. (I believe we may have our point of origin for the clean gene. ) Oil grease in silk-she could get that out. She could stare dust off a surface. Dishes beware, she didn't need a dishwasher to sanitize, she washed her dishes on the stove top, in boiling water. She was so good, she had white couches in her living room. And cream ones in her family room and (here is how you know she was great) you could sit on them. Basically she was the Chuck Norris of clean. So Grandma here's to you. I may not ever be asked to sing at the Ward Party, but when they need somebody to clean the lasagna pans in the kitchen, you know where I will be. Boiling some water to do the dishes and scrubbing that junk out of the oven. Hopefully, one day Grace and Ava will find themselves doing the same thing, they sort of have it in their genes.
